This is getting to be a habit. [rp for lapsedsaint]

[aesthetic_mojo]

As promised, Charlie had a yo-yo delivered to the New York offices of the Department of Justice. She had it hand delivered, open, with clear indicators who it was for and from. Hopefully that would get it through any bomb detection fairly quickly. The rest of that day was spent furniture shopping. She spent a small fortune for very few pieces she would have to wait longer than she liked for.

Her last stop was to replace what they'd drunk and get another bottle of something wonderful. If he didn't come, they would last forever. If he didn't come, the universe would make much more sense than it did at the moment. Still, when he didn't come the first night, she worried. Not so much that he was blowing her off, but that his headache was a thing of real concern.

There was nothing in her schedule to keep her from being home in the evenings, so she settled into a pattern. As the sun headed for the horizon, she changed into loose clothes, made herself a pot of tea, and sat one of two folding chairs on the patio. The kittens played at her feet until the sun went down completely. With all the things to mull over, her mind went most often to the necklace sitting on the kitchen counter. In its way, it was easier to think about that than of the man who might or might not show up at her door.

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[lapsedsaint]

The surrealism of having this type of conversation while they were both naked was not lost on him. But it did seem to be a defining characteristic of their relationships. The thought brought him up cold and he hugged her a little tighter for a moment.

"Your family?"

[aesthetic_mojo]

She nodded, not looking up. "My father makes Machiavelli look like a school yard gossip." She sighed. "So I decided to live as constrained a life as possible. I've taken only what I needed, worked for myself."

She nuzzled at him, taking comfort from his heat. "I haven't done anything wrong, at least I don't think so."

[lapsedsaint]

He did not mention that luring a religious man into bed might be wrong in someone's eyes, that just wouldn't have been fair since he didn't ever tell her no. Instead, he shifted and tilted her head up, smiling very faintly. "It isn't enough, in the end, though. You have to do something right."

[aesthetic_mojo]

She met his eyes for only a moment before she had to look away, swallowing hard. In that moment remembering that their first conversations had been forceful arguments in defense of a woman she was essentially betraying made her vaguely ill. So much for the idea of doing any good. "My first attempt at that has pretty much gone to shit, I'm afraid. On so many levels."

[lapsedsaint]

He touched her face, turning her back to look at him. "How so?"

[aesthetic_mojo]

She wouldn't meet his eyes, not when she was thinking about Dagny. "My first attempt was trying to protect a young woman from the impersonal government." She pressed against his hand, whimpering. "I don't think I did any good there."

[lapsedsaint]

He swallowed and closed his eyes. A moment later his hand fell and he sighed softly, turning away. There wasn't anything he could say, so he just went silent, shutting down on her.

[aesthetic_mojo]

She seriously considered getting up, leaving him in the bed with the smells and heat, while she ran away from it all. Doing that would be an admission that they'd really done what it felt like. She couldn't make that admission, not knowing he might well be there because she was trying to undo damage Dagny had done.

"Maybe I didn't do enough, soon enough. Maybe there wasn't anything to be done." She sighed softly. "Either way, that's not a part of this." She kissed his chest. "We've moved well beyond that."

[lapsedsaint]

He nodded slowly and rubbed her back, but didn't say anything. He had no idea what to say, what would be right in the situation. Maybe there just wasn't anything. His arms tightened around her and groaned softly. "Well beyond."

[aesthetic_mojo]

She kissed his chest a few more times, her lips barely brushing against his skin. "I want you to come back, to feel welcome here." She rested her chin on his chest and looked up at him. "While we figure out what the hell it is we're doing."

[lapsedsaint]

He nodded and leaned forward to kiss her. He got his hands on her sides and pulled her up on him to deepen the kiss. His eyes closed as he pulled back. "Charlie, what are we doing here?"

[aesthetic_mojo]

She moaned when he broke the kiss, not ready to leave it. "Kiss me like that again and we'll be having more sex. Right now." She put her head on his shoulder and laughed weakly. "I think we need to decide that. The only thing I know for sure is we aren't just having sex."

[lapsedsaint]

"No, it's not just sex. If it were, I would have never come back." He narrowed his eyes and sighed softly, then pressed a kiss to her hair. "But I don't know what it is."

[aesthetic_mojo]

She whimpered softly. Couldn't there be one simple answer in any of this? Just one would be lovely. "Maybe it doesn't matter what we think it is now. It won't stay that anyway."

She looked up at him. "I'd ask you what you want it to be, but you never expected to be in a bed with any woman, did you?"

[lapsedsaint]

He had to nod, what she'd said was true. "No, I did not. I've come close a few times, but always managed to keep my own pants on." He kissed her softly. "I've prayed about it. But God works in mysterious ways."

[aesthetic_mojo]

Her eyebrow crept up at the idea of being prayed about. That had to be a first. "If your god intends this, then mysterious doesn't cover it." She sat up a little so she could look him over. "I can probably be safe assuming you have no intentions of taking your pants off with anyone else if you are doing so with me. Do you expect the same thing of me?"

She thought she knew the answer to that, too, but she thought it was best to be clear.

[lapsedsaint]

He reached up and touched her face before his eyes closed. "I have no intention of even being in a position to take my pants off as long as I am welcome here." He swallowed and whispered. "I would expect the same, yes."

[aesthetic_mojo]

Hearing it hit her in a completely different place than she expected. Her throat didn't tighten or her chest, instead it was a spot low on her belly. She leaned into his hand and matched his whisper. "Then you have it."

She shifted forward to kiss him deeply, brushing her tongue over his lips. Just saying it wasn't enough.

[lapsedsaint]

He gave in, his mouth opening to her tongue, inviting her in. He whimpered roughly, his body reacting before his mind could stop him. He rolled so she was completely on top of him. His hands ended up on her ass, squeezing her soft flesh.

[aesthetic_mojo]

She put her knees beside his hips, lifting her ass to rock against his hands. Her hands went on either side of his head so she could press even harder into the kiss. She lashed her tongue over his, moaning in need. Every time they headed toward this, she needed it more.

[lapsedsaint]

He whimpered against her lips and squeezed her ass more fully. He pushed his tongue against her, tasting her and groaning roughly. He needed her, needed to be inside her. He was going to burn and, for a few minutes, he didn't care. He grabbed his hips and pulled her down against him, letting her feel how much he needed her.

[aesthetic_mojo]

She rocked slowly, rubbing against his cock and pressing back into his hands. He had to be able to feel how wet she was, how ready for him, but she wanted him to ask. Hearing him beg would be good, too, if she could hold out long enough without begging herself. She shifted her hands down to his chest, pressing her nails into him.

There was nothing keeping her from marking him now.

[lapsedsaint]

Her nails made him growl as he pushed up against her. "Please, Charlie. Don't hold out on me. I can't handle it." He shuddered, pulling her down into another kiss. He pressed his teeth into her bottom lip.

[aesthetic_mojo]

She lifted her hips, just a little, teasing them both. It drove her crazy that he gave her exactly what she wanted. She still didn't expect it and wondered when she'd get over feeling he might leave at any moment.

She couldn't tease for long, though, and she used the new angle from shifting up to get him at her opening. With a low moan, she sank down onto him. "I would never hold out on you. This is too good for that."

[lapsedsaint]

He shivered and pushed up into her, his eyes squeezed tightly shut. He had no idea what the appeal was to sex, why it felt so good. But he needed more of it. He wanted it. He needed it.